Saturday, October 10, 2009

# 2

So, sitting in solitude on my chair, elbow resting perpendicularly to desk, chin engraved to the unclean palm of my left hand, listening to Billie Holiday with who would have known; circulating thoughts. Oh yeah, did I mention I'm supposedly finishing my textbook notes and online test ? I've decided to give this a second go.

1. This goes to them : I'm not worth it. I don't think I am, so really, out of complete honesty, don't waste your time on me. I'll most likely limit myself because I'm not prepared for any type of commitment. My sole objective is what I strive for, and my goal is not looking too clear right now either. I'm a handful, quicker than you believe my change of mind will melt through your warm palm until the last subtle drop of resentment detaches from your fingers. I apologize.

2. After my late 2 am arrival last night, I told myself I loved someone. I'm afraid of it being true, or I just said it because the subject was deeply wounded to my mind. Either way, this little someone will have probably laughed at the thought of it, swearing it's a joke. I need to be more sure.

3. I don't know what to expect from you but I trust you so, _ ____ __ ___ _____ _ _________ ____. Yeah.

4. Recently, I did something I knew I should not have. Artificial feelings forced me to reciprocate from what a good friend keeps. I don't know if I should actually confess this because I'm afraid of the outcomes, I should have known better and been less self-absorbed. I disrespected a genuine person's feelings by exposing them to the least convenient source.

No comments: